Hands Free Whopper Holder

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Burger King

 

Burger King came up with the perfect way to enjoy a Whopper with minimal effort.

Apparently, Burger King gave fifty of its loyalty program members in Puerto Rico hands free Whopper holders that can be worn around the neck so their hands can be used for other tasks.

I don’t know if this story is true or just a rumor, but the fact is, I need one. Now.

Watch the commercial:

Paul Ryan Gets Pumped, Bro

TIME recently released photographs of Vice Presidential candidate Paul Ryan demonstrating his fitness regime when he was nominated for 2011 Person of the Year.

“Hey – That’s too much weight, bro.”

TIME

 

I can’t get over how ridiculous these pictures are. The first thing I thought when I saw these photos was ‘Dude, Paul Ryan is totally a Bro.’

So I was delighted to discover that extensive research has already been conducted to determine Paul Ryan’s bro status.

In August, Gawker conducted an in-depth evaluation to answer the question, “Who is the biggest Bro in the presidential race?”

The author evaluated Barack Obama, Joe Biden, Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan based on sports, fashion/grooming, education, beer drinking and “Expert” Opinions.

If the winner isn’t obvious to you, I won’t ruin the surprise by revealing the results here.

Also in August, Mother Jones declared Paul Ryan the Frattiest Veep Candidate Ever.

And one more thing, you should watch this video of David Letterman making fun of Paul Ryan’s workout photos on the Late Show:

Less Bad > More Bad

President Obama on the Daily Show with Jon Stewart 

Official White House Photo by Pete Souza

From The Daily Show: Comedian Larry David wants all of the “whiners” to understand that President Barack Obama’s first term was less bad than it could have been!

Please enjoy this satirical campaign video in which Larry David defends the Obama Doctrine that “less bad” is better than “more bad.”

Video ==>> Barack Obama: It Could Have Been Worse

Learn the Proper Words for your Private Parts

 

This delightful song teaches children the proper names for their private parts! Please enjoy this video clip “Proper Words,” from “Strong Kids, Safe Kids” (1984) starring Henry “The Fonz” Winkler.

The lyrics, just in case you need clarification:

Amazon

 

Vulva. Is what girls have down below. Vulva, when she’s naked it will show. All girls have a vulva, so no matter what you’ve heard, remember that vulva, is the proper word.

Both boys and girls have breasts, each person recognizes. They’re found upon our chests, and grow to different sizes.

Our anus, is a useful thing indeed. The anus, gives relief in time of need. We all have an anus, so no matter what you’ve heard, remember that anus, is the proper word. So don’t be appalled, cause that’s what they’re called, and each of them’s a proper word!”